whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
she looked like the before picture.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
