you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
As shirtless as possible
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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