So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
