New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
