so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
im having a threesome with these popsicles
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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