so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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