I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize