she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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