Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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