Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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