She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize