Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
