i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Did you pee in the oven last night??
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize
