Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
