I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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