I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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