u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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