What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
