these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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