oh god the rape fog is back!
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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