last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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