I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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