he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
