the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
