is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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