ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
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