Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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