goodnight i made you a song goodbye
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
