Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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