Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
