I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize
