they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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