sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
