You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
