I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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