Farmville is her only friend.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
