i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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