don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
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