Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize