Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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