i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
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