No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The air was thick with penises
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize