Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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