I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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