theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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