OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize