Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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