You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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