its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
