Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
